Asking questions has been a key part of helping me understand the world better. When that little “nag” enters my mind, I have to find an answer. My parents nurtured my curiosity when I was a child. Instead of just giving me answers, my mom made me find the answer on my own. Maybe it was poring over the World Book Encyclopedias that sparked even more curiosity in me. Or perhaps it was the public school field trips to art exhibits and history museums, or the lessons on critical thinking and celebrations of diverse cultures. Regardless, I’m deeply grateful for that curious mindset.
But curiosity doesn’t just benefit the curious person—it impacts everyone around them. When we’re curious, we send a signal to others that we are genuinely interested in the world and in them. Studies show a direct correlation between the release of dopamine and talking about ourselves. In fact, some research even suggests that people would forgo monetary rewards just for the chance to talk about themselves. So, when we ask someone a question, they’re often all in, sharing their thoughts and feelings. And who do they associate with that dopamine hit? The person who asked the question. It’s a subtle way of speeding up the trust process.
When I worked at Amazon, a company that’s well-known for its relentless drive toward innovation, one of the key leadership principles we were encouraged to embrace was "Learn and Be Curious." While Amazon may have its critics, the principle behind this is universal—leaders (and individuals) must continuously seek knowledge. Exploring what we don’t know can spark creativity, open doors to new opportunities, and ultimately drive innovation.
So, how do you cultivate curiosity in your own life? Let’s break it down into three categories: Curiosity of the World, Curiosity of People, and Curiosity of Self.
The world is a big place. And there’s a lot we don’t even know (or will ever know). But we don’t have to know everything, we just have to be willing to learn.
I know you are busy and likely don’t have time to read an entire book but reading articles from other countries or about topics you’re not familiar with can expand your mind and build your curiosity muscle. Navigating websites for topics or products you don’t know a lot about can also provide you with new insight. And if you’re short on time, check out a social media page of a person or organization you don’t follow. All of these small things help build your curiosity muscle.
Looking at the world around you with a curious eye also looks like viewing the world without judgement. It’s easy to label things as “good” or “bad” and leave it at that. But what if you asked questions? What if you sought to see the situation from another angle? I’ve found that when I encourage people to do this, they leave with more understanding and more empathy. The world could definitely use more of both.
We are a diverse population. Shucks, even in family units there are ties that don’t fully understand one another. But it doesn’t have to be that way.
Want to know someone better? Ask them open-ended questions. Don't fall into the “How was your day?” trap. Instead, ask “What was your favorite part of the day?” or “Who really irritated you today?” These types of questions not only light up the other person’s brain, but it also moves beyond the surface.
Being present is something that is underrated AND tough for some. There are so many distractions. But, truly listening to someone, not jumping to conclusions, or thinking about what YOU are going to say, allows you to listen with the intent to understand. If you do it right – be present and ask open ended questions – you’ll create a connection.
You might be thinking, “why do I need to be curious about myself?” Self-awareness helps fight bias and bad habits, while also making you more likeable.
First things first, you have to embrace a beginner’s mindset. Approach life as though you know nothing – even the thing you are an expert in. Why? A beginner’s mindset makes us more open to learning, exploring, and asking. Think about kids between ages 2 and 8. They are all so curious. They don’t know anything, so they have to be. You have nothing to lose and everything to gain when you approach life with a beginner's mindset.
Enriching the curious mind also means being open to being wrong. You don’t have to know everything. You can’t. And you don’t have to be right about everything. No one likes a know-it-all. Literally. Being open to being wrong can lead to a deeper understanding of the word. When we realize we don’t know everything, we’re more willing to explore.
Cultivating curiosity may activate new brain muscles. Cultivating curiosity may be uncomfortable. Lean into it. Take note of how you feel inside. What’s stirred up? Why do you think “that” was stirred? Knowing a little bit about a lot, opens the door for so many interesting conversations with people. And, knowing a little bit about a lot leaves room for being curious enough to learn more.
